I have a movie date night with Adam on Thursday! *happy dance*
And, I'm going to have popcorn, and a few boxes of candy. It's going to be a cheesy, wonderful cuddle-filled evening! Woot!
I'm pretty happy today. I worked, and got a third set of piercings in my ears today. Samantha had to do some more training, so I thought I would go ahead and give it a shot. That's all the holes going into my head (or any other part of my body!) that I am doing!
I cleaned my house on Sunday and yesterday, and it looks so good! A clean house makes me very happy, although getting the motivation to actually get it that way escapes me often! I also rearranged my bathroom, bedroom and laundry room. Got rid of more stuff that I never need or even look at. The more junk that I clear out, the happier and more relaxed I am. It's a great feeling! I can actually see the progress I am making now.
Very exciting!
Now, I am very hungry, so I am going to go scrounge up some food and take a nice, relaxing shower and curl up in bed with my puppy and sleep. :)
Have a great night (or day, if that's when you are reading this), my dear readers!
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
The tree project...
Up to over 300 ancestors now.. and that is just stemming back from my maternal grandmothers.. exciting!
It's become addicting to work on my family tree.. I didn't want to stop last night, but finally my headache overcame my ability to stare at the screen. I'm not used to staring at a computer monitor for 7-8 hours a day!
It's become addicting to work on my family tree.. I didn't want to stop last night, but finally my headache overcame my ability to stare at the screen. I'm not used to staring at a computer monitor for 7-8 hours a day!
Sunday, April 26, 2009
Just a quick typing...
A quick note about a few things:
One, I finally decided to attack my family tree and find out more about my roots. I spent most of today just doing the maternal line of my family. Ancestry.com is AWESOME! I usually only can take a little bit of staring at a monitor at a time, but I think I spend at least six hours on the computer today, working on my lineage. I started with just a few papers that I received from my aunt, approximately 25-30 people.. and now I am at 181 of my ancestors figured out. Yeah!
Two, I wish that if people hinted or suggested that they were going to do something that they would follow through. It's rather annoying to be expecting some sort of event to occur, when it was mentioned in promising words.. and then nothing. Not even a few words to say that it wasn't going to happen. GRRR.... And that's all on that topic. I am not usually one to dwell.(EDITOR 'S NOTE: This has been happening to me a lot lately by different people, it is not any one particular person. I just had to vent it out and didn't want to name names.)
Three...Being at home, grounded by my defunct car is pretty okay, I am figuring out. More about what happened with my car, perhaps tomorrow morning.. but it shows me how much people really want to see me when I am not the one driving to them. It gives me more time to focus on myself and activities that I've been procrastinating.
Four.. work is going okay. I am slowly getting the person that is trying to cause problems for me out of the department. (I hope.) At least management can see now that I am not the incompetent one, because now others are complaining about her with things she's done and said to them. All in due time, All in due time..
Five.. Adam and I are still dating. I am not used to only seeing the guy that I am dating only once a week, but I guess it'll work out. He makes me happy, and I hope I do the same for him.. so it's all good.
All for now. I must go wrap up things for the night. My eyes are hurting from so much screen exposure today. Good night, everyone!
One, I finally decided to attack my family tree and find out more about my roots. I spent most of today just doing the maternal line of my family. Ancestry.com is AWESOME! I usually only can take a little bit of staring at a monitor at a time, but I think I spend at least six hours on the computer today, working on my lineage. I started with just a few papers that I received from my aunt, approximately 25-30 people.. and now I am at 181 of my ancestors figured out. Yeah!
Two, I wish that if people hinted or suggested that they were going to do something that they would follow through. It's rather annoying to be expecting some sort of event to occur, when it was mentioned in promising words.. and then nothing. Not even a few words to say that it wasn't going to happen. GRRR.... And that's all on that topic. I am not usually one to dwell.(EDITOR 'S NOTE: This has been happening to me a lot lately by different people, it is not any one particular person. I just had to vent it out and didn't want to name names.)
Three...Being at home, grounded by my defunct car is pretty okay, I am figuring out. More about what happened with my car, perhaps tomorrow morning.. but it shows me how much people really want to see me when I am not the one driving to them. It gives me more time to focus on myself and activities that I've been procrastinating.
Four.. work is going okay. I am slowly getting the person that is trying to cause problems for me out of the department. (I hope.) At least management can see now that I am not the incompetent one, because now others are complaining about her with things she's done and said to them. All in due time, All in due time..
Five.. Adam and I are still dating. I am not used to only seeing the guy that I am dating only once a week, but I guess it'll work out. He makes me happy, and I hope I do the same for him.. so it's all good.
All for now. I must go wrap up things for the night. My eyes are hurting from so much screen exposure today. Good night, everyone!
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Weekend Trip to the Raptor Center
Late, but here it is. Adam and I went to the Raptor Center this weekend, and got out in nature for the first time together. It was great! I always prefer to be around trees instead of concrete, and it was great to experience it together. Another thing that we have in common is the fact that we both love being outside. I love climbing around on the rocks, hiking and breathing in more fresh air than you can find here in town. We went around and saw the birds first, and then made our way down to the lake and climbed the rocks around the lake. We found some great fossils, but unfortunately I forgot the few that I was going to bring home. (Oh well, I can find even more the next time I go!)
Then, I started to take pictures. So, we made our way back around the cages and down to the bird watching station. Not only did we see some pretty birds, but saw a momma deer and two babies. Deer are such pretty creatures.
Here are some of the pictures that I took while we were there...
Woot! I wanted to post about it earlier, but when I have a serious blog entry in mind, I cannot think about writing any others until I am done mulling over it.
Then, I started to take pictures. So, we made our way back around the cages and down to the bird watching station. Not only did we see some pretty birds, but saw a momma deer and two babies. Deer are such pretty creatures.
Here are some of the pictures that I took while we were there...
Woot! I wanted to post about it earlier, but when I have a serious blog entry in mind, I cannot think about writing any others until I am done mulling over it.
The past affecting the future
"The only man a girl can depend on is her daddy."
That line from Grease is one that has resonated with me for years, and it has even affected the way that I approach my relationships. I think this is, because in my case, I didn't even have my own dad to depend on growing up. He dropped out of my life right before my 2nd birthday, (August 7th, 1986) and didn't come back into my life until about two days before my 16th.
Fourteen years of absence from my life, and all he could say was, "I always MEANT to call or write, but time just gets away from us." Ten to one, he wouldn't have ever gotten back in contact with me, if it wasn't for the letters that I sent him secretly throughout 6th grade. And, not even then.. had it not been for my former step-mom who happened to find those letters while doing some spring cleaning! I owe it to her for the relationship I have with my father, albeit shaky and off-on as it is. At least I've gotten to meet my two half brothers, and my former step-sisters.
How has that quote and my experiences with an absent father affected my dating relationships? Easy. (Or so it may seem to me, now, that I've been thinking about it a lot (lightly for the last couple of years, heavily for the last half of year or so.)
Since I was about 16-17, I convinced most of myself that I didn't want children. I dated guys that didn't want them as well, and guys that weren't very dependable. I guess I figured that if I couldn't count on my daddy, then there weren't any guys that I could even attempt to count on to be there for me.
My realization of what I really wanted from life started coming unearthed, in my mind, during the last (very rocky) months of my previous relationship with Jeff. I was seeing how deep of a mess he was getting himself in, and I know that sooner or later, (pardon the crudeness,) the shit is going to hit the fan for him. I realized that I needed a man that I could depend on to stay out of trouble to be able to support me and a future family. I needed a man that could stay out of jail/prison and not resort to illegal practices to make money just for kicks. I needed a man that I could trust with all my heart and soul around myself and any possible children. And, perhaps most of all, I needed a man that wasn't an alcoholic like my father. Jeff didn't fit any of that bill.. which is when I just considered it a lost cause.
The truth of it is, I DO want marriage and a couple of children. I just hope with all that I have that I find a guy that will WANT to walk with me throughout all the experiences, trials, joys and tribulations of life together, no matter what happens or what comes our way. And hope that I don't have a 'hit and run' man.. one's just looking for flings and no commitment. (Like my father admitted when he dated my mother and then found out I was on the way.)
I'm scared to death that I wouldn't be a good momma... but if I didn't worry about that, shouldn't that raise more red flags about my abilities and my mindset?
I've been dating Adam for three months now. Through conversation about the topic and seeing him interact with Austin once, I know that he'd be there for me in the future if we happened to have children. And I know that he would be a good daddy. This is the first relationship that I have had that I am feeling really good about and am truly excited to see where it takes us. Perhaps it's because I've decided that I am not hiding my wants, needs and desires anymore. Or maybe it's because I have a really good feeling about us? It's definitely a combination of the two; and a whole lot more!
Maybe the line should be revised to be not that, "The only guy that a girl can depend on is her daddy," but that, "The only thing that a girl can depend on to show her what she needs and desires from her future is her past?"
That line from Grease is one that has resonated with me for years, and it has even affected the way that I approach my relationships. I think this is, because in my case, I didn't even have my own dad to depend on growing up. He dropped out of my life right before my 2nd birthday, (August 7th, 1986) and didn't come back into my life until about two days before my 16th.
Fourteen years of absence from my life, and all he could say was, "I always MEANT to call or write, but time just gets away from us." Ten to one, he wouldn't have ever gotten back in contact with me, if it wasn't for the letters that I sent him secretly throughout 6th grade. And, not even then.. had it not been for my former step-mom who happened to find those letters while doing some spring cleaning! I owe it to her for the relationship I have with my father, albeit shaky and off-on as it is. At least I've gotten to meet my two half brothers, and my former step-sisters.
How has that quote and my experiences with an absent father affected my dating relationships? Easy. (Or so it may seem to me, now, that I've been thinking about it a lot (lightly for the last couple of years, heavily for the last half of year or so.)
Since I was about 16-17, I convinced most of myself that I didn't want children. I dated guys that didn't want them as well, and guys that weren't very dependable. I guess I figured that if I couldn't count on my daddy, then there weren't any guys that I could even attempt to count on to be there for me.
My realization of what I really wanted from life started coming unearthed, in my mind, during the last (very rocky) months of my previous relationship with Jeff. I was seeing how deep of a mess he was getting himself in, and I know that sooner or later, (pardon the crudeness,) the shit is going to hit the fan for him. I realized that I needed a man that I could depend on to stay out of trouble to be able to support me and a future family. I needed a man that could stay out of jail/prison and not resort to illegal practices to make money just for kicks. I needed a man that I could trust with all my heart and soul around myself and any possible children. And, perhaps most of all, I needed a man that wasn't an alcoholic like my father. Jeff didn't fit any of that bill.. which is when I just considered it a lost cause.
The truth of it is, I DO want marriage and a couple of children. I just hope with all that I have that I find a guy that will WANT to walk with me throughout all the experiences, trials, joys and tribulations of life together, no matter what happens or what comes our way. And hope that I don't have a 'hit and run' man.. one's just looking for flings and no commitment. (Like my father admitted when he dated my mother and then found out I was on the way.)
I'm scared to death that I wouldn't be a good momma... but if I didn't worry about that, shouldn't that raise more red flags about my abilities and my mindset?
I've been dating Adam for three months now. Through conversation about the topic and seeing him interact with Austin once, I know that he'd be there for me in the future if we happened to have children. And I know that he would be a good daddy. This is the first relationship that I have had that I am feeling really good about and am truly excited to see where it takes us. Perhaps it's because I've decided that I am not hiding my wants, needs and desires anymore. Or maybe it's because I have a really good feeling about us? It's definitely a combination of the two; and a whole lot more!
Maybe the line should be revised to be not that, "The only guy that a girl can depend on is her daddy," but that, "The only thing that a girl can depend on to show her what she needs and desires from her future is her past?"
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