People are funny.
I don't mean 'haha' funny, but just funny in not so good ways. I know that many of my readers didn't catch the second blog entry that I wrote last night. It was titled, 'Confessions' and it consisted of me trying to work things that are festering in the back of my mind.
It was posted less than ten minutes, before one of my readers (who it involved), became very angry over it. They defended themselves, with some valid points..I then made the entry 'private'. However, some of their validity escaped when they basically told me that I had it wrong, and I needed to state the facts. I would like to question how my feelings are wrong? Everyone perceives things differently. And I wrote how I felt about the particular events, and the current situation. Yet, I am wrong.
Yes, there are two sides to every story. The truth lies somewhere in the middle. I had teacher after teacher in my schooling say that, in reference to many written accounts of events, and to many parts of current situations and past historical events.
Regardless, I had made the blog entry private, as to not create any more chaos, or 'waves'. And I didn't limit that restriction to just my major blog. I also deleted it off of my fubar profile, my spicepad profile, and made it private on my myspace profile. I thought that would be the end of it. One person reading it, and no one else would be the wiser that it was ever written.
Wrong.
Not five minutes after I made my myspace entry private, I received a message from one of my readers. They complained that it was private and they wanted to read it. I declined, saying that it was a diary entry for me and apologized to them.
I then received a return message saying that blog entries are public, or are supposed to be. This particular reader wanted the details about what was in it 'or at least a hint'!!
So, I have gotten one reader upset that it was public without their side of the story to defend them..and then I have gotten another reader upset because they couldn't read it.
And I got upset with myself because I couldn't decide whether or not I should have made it public, private, or not written it at all!! I ended up in an disagreement with the person it involved, and really made my day crappy today with it's residue. I hate arguing with them, they are very important to me.
What do you think, dear reader?
Should I have censored myself? Should I keep some things unwritten? Do I have to make EVERY entry public for my readers?
Should I give the person a chance to write a rebuttal and republish that entry including it?
Is there areas of life that should be off-topic in my blogging endeavor?
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16 comments:
I love reading your blogs and I don't think you should censor yourself. Remember the freedom of speech? :)
By the way, the part about..."I then recieved a return message.." the word "recieved" was misspelled. It should be "received" (rule: "i" before "e" except after "c").
Hope the spelling error/correction doesn't upset you. Keep blogging.
Your Dear Reader :)
I already noticed that.. and fixed :P
But, do you think I should clear my blogging intentions with the person that it's about? I mean, I don't usually name names or what happened..
I think if you really want to clear the air, post their comments on there just to be fair? If it's really personal stuff maybe make it a private blog?
Keep Blogging. :)
no you should be able to publish and write whatever you want to write about and i know who you are talking about in here a little bit and my bad for probing a bit. curiosity killed the cat. haha.
eh well its ur blog.. YOUR blog.. as long as u didnt give the persons name.. or a link to their profile.. y should it matter? guilty conscious of said person maybe? they can comment n defend themselves cant they?
I don't mention names or events when it is about sensitive things or things that many people don't know, out of consideration for the people involved.
Do you think I should republish that particular entry, and let them rebuttal in the comments?
Well, for starters it is pretty much implied that YOUR blog is your thoughts and your perspective on things. Anyone taking it as anything more than that doesn't quite know what a blog is. It should only be taken as that.
Anyone can leave a comment on your blog. That, or their own blog, is their space for a rebuttal. That is where they can tell their side of the story.
At the same time, some people don't really like their personal business being spread all over the internet. I certainly don't. Without knowing the contents of the blog in question I couldn't tell you if it's something I would want other people to know. But unless it is something personal that I told you in confidence, I doubt I'd be bothered by you relating events that I was involved in.
As for the reader that was upset you made it private...well, too darn bad. A blog is a diary of sorts, and some things are nobodies business. These entries are here for you, not just for the readers.
On to the topic of self-censorship. That's not a call anyone but you can make. And it is something you do every day whether you realize it or not. There are thoughts and feelings that are only for us. Anyone that says there life is an open book is a liar.
:)
The only real advice I can give, is if you're not sure you should write something that involves someone else...ask them or let them read it in an email first. It's not always easy to tell if we're crossing a line we shouldn't because, as you said, you only have the one perspective.
I should state that I didn't name names, and I didn't specify what the events were. It was just my thoughts that stem from it, over a year later.
It was vague, but still got the core feelings and thoughts out that I have.
Does that make sense?
I figured it's up to them to spill the private details.
In reality all you are doing is writing down your own words, thoughts, feelings, etc. For someone to dispute them claiming lack of validity is absurd! These are yours, period. We can take this all the way back to the Constitution and freedom of speech.
However, from another view, no one forced that person to read your blog. They chose to. They put themselves in a positions where they felt the need to defend themselves.
In the end, does it really matter? Are these people you were writing about so trivial, insecure, and immature to think that something you wrote on a myspace blog is going to somehow drastically change the course of their life? And if this is the case, why exactly, would you surround yourself with people of that caliber?
What is written on myspace stays on myspace. It is merely a view/opinion. Just because it is in print does not make it factual. Do not, in any way, censor yourself simply because you have a mind and an opinion!
Its your blog chica. Don't let people push you around. You can state whatever u want...if people get mad or offended, 2 bad.
Its like in the mummz....people were getting mad because i wouldn't let them sucker punch me with stupid comments. I would approve their comment and then respond directly to their dumbness....so all they did was end up embarrassing themselves. And omg they cried!!
"Oh i see your approving comments...that's not fair"
Oh but isn't it?
Don't take crap from anyone. Your blog is YOUR journal! Screw what anyone else has 2 say about it.
After reading "Treazon's" comment, I agree. If readers don't like it, they know what they can do with themselves. :)
Personal Censorship? Nah. If they keep giving you trouble, delete them from your buddy list
and/or block them.
Your Dear Reader
I can't delete them.. they are a friend of mine in real life..
your page. do what u want
That seems to be the common answer..
Do you guys have any stories to share on the topic?
There is nothing wrong with writing a blog about whatever you are feeling and if you feel later that it was something that could possible be construed as offensive then you have every right to make it private or delete it altogether.
I then received a return message saying that blog entries are public, or are supposed to be."
No. Blogs are for the person writing them to either vent out in a place other than a person or a place that can easily be accessed OR for keeping other people updated on things. They can also be used to share funny stories or sad ones, news clips etc. There is NO rule that states that you HAVE to share all of your blog entries with everyone. I, for one, have a few that I write for ME and ME only and if they can't respect it, then oh well. I only ever ask to read private blogs if they concern a close friend whom I am worried about at the time. Usually my 1. Anyway, those are my thoughts on the whole thing.
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